As I Want

As I Want

World premiere: Berlinale 2021 / Encounters

Cairo, January 25, 2013: An explosion of sexual assault takes place on Tahrir Square on the day of the second anniversary of the revolution. In response, a massive outpouring of enraged women fill the streets and Samaher Alqadi joins them - bringing her camera as protection in the battle and to document the protests of a growing Women’s Rebellion, not knowing where the story will lead her. 
 
Samaher becomes pregnant during filming and this prompts her to consider her childhood in Palestine and what it means to be a woman and a mother. She begins an imaginary conversation with her own mother, who dies before she can see her one last time. Samaher begins to form the words left unsaid and tells us her deepest secrets in an intimate inner dialog that guides us through the narrative. She goes on a traumatic visit back to her parent’s house in Ramallah, where she confronts and recreates dark memories of a childhood she managed to escape. 
 
Meanwhile, the struggle in Egypt continues and, even after the birth of her son, Samaher still finds herself on the frontline. 

Credits
International title
As I Want
Countries of production
Egypt, Norway, France, Palestine, Germany
Year
2021
Length
88'
Written & directed by
Samaher Alqadi
Producer
Karim El Hakim
Editor
Gladys Joujou
Cinematography
Samaher Alqadi & Karim El Hakim
Produced by
Prophecy Films (Egypt)
Co-produced by
Nefise Özkal Lorentzen & Jørgen Lorentzen (Integral Film, Norway), Serge Gordey (Temps Noir, France), Mohanad Yacubi (Idioms Films, Palestine), Thomas Kaske (Kaske Film, Germany)